Star Trek Original Cast
By AMY BIANCOLLI, Hearst Newspapers
Eric Bana says he’d never win a Star Trek quiz, but what about you? Are you geek enough to try? If you have to ask, you probably aren’t up to the multiple-choice questions below, which mine ancient Trek lore from the classic series and its spate of original films.
1) The original show ran on NBC and lasted how many episodes?
2) When did Kirk utter the immortal words, “Beam me up, Scotty”?
a) In the one with Drusilla, the Roman slave.
b) In the one with the mock Nazis.
c) In the one with the mad-mommy rock monster.
3) Director J.J. Abrams says he snuck a tribble (i.e., purring alien fuzzball) into his new Star Trek. What is “The Trouble with Tribbles”?
a) They eat constantly.
b) They reproduce constantly.
c) They eat and reproduce constantly.
d) They eat and produce methane constantly.
4) In “Return of the Archons,” we find the following common plot device:
a) Kirk totally ignores the Prime Directive banning interference with indigenous cultures.
b) Kirk talks a computer into destroying itself.
c) The Enterprise gets sucked toward a planet by a mysterious force.
d) All of the above.
5) The new movie features a desolate ice planet named Delta Vega, which also appears in the original Star Trek — but the last time we saw it, it looked like southern California. In which episode did it appear?
a) “The Man Trap” (Salt monster sucks face, literally).
b) “The Gamesters of Triskelion” (Kirk, Chekov and Uhura get enslaved by disembodied gambling addicts).
c) “Where No Man Has Gone Before” (Kirk’s bud gets jolted by an electromagnetic field, turns spooky and godlike).
d) “Amok Time” (Spock, in heat, heads back to Vulcan and sorta kinda accidentally almost kills Kirk).
6) It also offers a glimpse of Kirk’s youth in the Hawkeye State. In what time-traveling episode or movie does he confess: “I’m from Iowa. I only work in outer space?”
a) “Assignment: Earth” (Kirk, Spock & Co. zing to 1968, meet Terri Garr).
b) “Tomorrow is Yesterday” (Kirk, Spock & Co. zing to 1969, snatch pilot.)
c) “Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home” (Kirk, Spock & Co. zing to 1986, rescue whales)
d) None of the above.
7) How many times did Spock smile in the original show and films?
b) A buncha times.
8 ) ”The Enemy Within,” in which a transporter malfunction cleaves the skipper into good and evil halves, featured the first incidence of what iconic combat maneuever?
a) The Spock nerve pinch.
b) The Kirk flying-leg kick.
c) The Vulcan death grip.
d) The Chekov scream.
9) What famous historical personage did not appear in an episode of the original series?
a) Abraham Lincoln
b) Jack the Ripper
c) Teddy Roosevelt
d) Genghis Khan
10) In the new film, Spock’s human mother is portrayed (briefly) by Winona Ryder. What Emmy winner played her originally?
a) Jane Wyatt
b) Mary Tyler Moore
c) Barbara Stanwyk
d) Paula Abdul
11) In Abrams’ “Star Trek,” a cantankerous Dr. McCoy complains that his ex-wife fleeced him for everything “but my bones.” Until now, fans had assumed his nickname derived from:
a) His lapsed membership in the American Academy of Orthopedic Surgeons.
b) Emily Deschanel’s character on the Fox crime drama, which he watched obsessively in sickbay.
c) The Radiohead song “Bones” (“I don’t want to be crippled cracked/ Shoulders, wrists, knees and back”).
d) “Sawbones,” an archaic term for surgeons.
12) The new film also features a voice cameo by an original series cast-member who doubled, then as now, as the ship’s computer. Who was it?
a) The late Majel Barrett Roddenberry, wife of series creator Gene Roddenberry (Nurse Chapel).
b) Grace Lee Whitney (Yeoman Janice Rand).
c) Nichelle Nichols (Lieutenant Uhura).
d) Walter Koenig (Ensign Chekov).
13) Speaking of time travel, arguably the best episode ever was “City on the Edge of Forever,” in which a high McCoy (long story) leaps through a donut to 1930 Earth,
changing history. To correct it, Kirk and Spock must prevent him from rescuing a saintly soup-kitchen missionary played by this future star of a 1980s primetime soap:
a) Linda Gray
b) Joan Van Ark
c) Joan Collins
d) Lorenzo Lamas
14) The 11th “Star Trek” cribs liberally from “Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.” Which line from the new film isn’t from the old?
a) “I don’t believe in the no-win scenario.”
b) “Our destinies have changed.”
c) “I have been, and always shall be, your friend.”
d) “Are you out of your Vulcan mind?!!”
15) Nero, “Trek’s” new Romulan nemesis, is notable for his bald pate and awesome scalp tattoos. Khan is legendary for which distinguishing features?
a) His impish eyes and melting smile.
b) His long gray hair and freakalicious pecs.
c) His thickly cushioned luxury and soft Corinthian leather.
d) All of the above.
ANSWERS: 1) c. 2) d. 3) c. 4) d. 5) c. 6) c. 7) b. 8 ) a. 9) c. 10) a. 11) d. 12) a. 13) c. 14) b. 15) b.
If you get all 15 right: You’re more pathetic than I am. Almost.
If you get 10-14 right: You sure can hold your Tranya!
If you get 5-9 right: Maybe you’d better work on that Vulcan salute.
If you get 1-4 right: You’re a doctor, not a Trekkie.
If you get 0 right: WOW!
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